Troubled Hearts, Troubled Minds
by pajec
Summary: AU. The formerly known Anakin Skywalker, now Darth Vader, realizes that Padme is still alive. Read and review! [[COMPLETE]]
1. Chapter 1

_Author's Note:_ This is my first ever fanfic, so if it's not too good, please leave a review and explain why. I tried to portray all the pain Padme and Anakin felt to my best extent and hopefully I did a good job at it. If there are some things that aren't correct such as names and different facts from the real Star Wars movie, please inform me and I'll fix it right away. I hope you enjoy the story...

_Disclaimer_: I do not own any of this. Blah de lah.

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**Troubled Hearts**

_By: Pautsz_

_The sound of a rustling river can be heard in the background. It's beautiful. When you think of peace, this place would go hand and hand with it. But she isn't thinking of that right now. All she is thinking about is how happy she will be when she finds him, because finally, they can be together. Finally, she won't have to be scared._

_Then there's a presence behind her, a soothing presence, one that she is most familiar with. She smiles because she knows what to expect when she turns around. _

_She whispers "Ani…" and the flying feeling in her stomach becomes stronger, almost unbearable. _

_She turns...then screams. _

_The soothing feeling is gone, replaced by a horrible pain one can't explain in words. There's breathing, labored breathing. And black all around. It isn't what she expected. The sweet serenely is gone. It's all dark. _

_He screams, "I HATE YOU. HOW CAN YOU DO THIS TO ME? LOOK AT ME! LOOK AT WHAT YOU'VE DONE TO ME!" and all but at once the mask is gone, revealing a scarred man, so grotesquely deformed. _

_His blue eyes show hardness that she has only encountered so few a times, and never were they because of her. _

"_Ani, I'm so sorry. Forgive me, forgive me, please" while tears stream down her face. "I never wanted to hurt you, yet all this pain because of me. I'm sorry." _

_Yet the man screams "I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME. YET YOU LIED. PADME, I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU. I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU!" _

_And with this Vader approaches her, ready to execute the pain that she caused him. She screams…_


	2. Chapter 2

Padme wakes up, sweat drenching her body. Her heart is beating so much she has trouble sitting up. One of her servants comes in.

"Milady are you alright? You were screaming. One might have thought Darth Vader was in this room right this instant trying to attack you. You know how dangerous it is nowadays with him trying to find you."

"Yes, I understand Bruu. Of all the people, I should know that the best. It was just a dream Bruu. The same one I get every night. But it was only a dream, nothing more."

Padme instantly thought of the dreams that Anakin used to get when his mother was captured by the Tuscan raiders. But his were true because he had the Force and could prophesize. She didn't. So that meant that these dreams meant nothing. But she couldn't help herself. She kept having these nagging feelings in the back of her head, these feelings that kept telling her that she should just face her husband instead of being locked up and hiding from him. She knew with all her heart that she would rather be dead then not being with him. But she decided not to think about it, she needed some rest…

"Well thank you Bruu for checking in on me. And thank you for the water and pills."

Bruu handed her a tray holding a glass of water and two tiny white pills sitting next to it.

"You're a great help," and smiled encouragingly.

"Why you're welcome Milady. Sleep well." And with that Bruu left the room.

Padme knew the pills did not matter. She wouldn't be able to go to sleep for a while…

She decided that she would have to face the facts sooner or later. She couldn't keep hiding from what fate had in store for her and Anakin. Padme decided that since she wouldn't be sleeping soon, she'd reminisce on what had occurred during the last two years…

After Padme gave birth to her two baby twins Luke and Leia, the council had decided to fake Padme's death because they believed her to be in danger. They knew that if Vader had thought her to be alive he would try to reclaim her, and now being on the dark side of the force, try to kill her. They also knew that he wouldn't believe them if the council had just told him that she was dead, so they recreated her body and placed "her" in a coffin. This lie worked for a little while, and Padme was believed to be safe. What the council didn't know, was that Padme still kept the bond between herself and her husband, so that he knew where she was. He knew that she was still alive, but luckily he didn't know where. Until now. The council had informed her not long ago that Darth Vader was after her. It was only a matter of time before she was his…

At times she would just think of giving herself up to him, and she was very close to doing so, but thankfully, one of her servants stopped her and brought her back on track. But the idea was still very persistent in her mind. In her heart she still felt that her Ani would never hurt her. He promised her that he would always protect her, that he would never hurt her. She still loved him no matter what, and she knew that he still had to love her. He had to…She still had a reason for living if she knew that Anakin still loved her.

"Well," feeling more hopeful then ever, "I need my beauty sleep." Padme laughed to herself because she knew that the only person she would ever try to look beautiful for was Ani. No one else mattered to her.

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_Author: Sorry that the chapters are so short... Like it so far? Hope so. It'll get better. I promise. If the story's a bit cliche, eh, i couldn't help it. I love all that mushy stuff. It makes my heart beat. smiles._


	3. Chapter 3

"Milady, please, wake up. It's time to eat breakfast." It was Bruu.

Sometimes Padme felt like a child. She had to be woken up when she didn't want to be, she was fed when they wanted her to be fed. It was odd. She felt that she had no freedom whatsoever. But the food on the plate smelled delicious. She couldn't help fight the growing temptation in her stomach. It gave a loud growl. They started laughing.

"Well I guess my stomach feels the same way too, Bruu." She said as she smiled to the servant. She received a warm grin in return.

"I hope you enjoy the food, Milady. I feel you are getting rather too thin for my liking," as Bruu scanned the former senator's body. "Afterwards, the council would like to see you. They have something very important to discuss, and that was all they told me."

Padme nodded. She really did hate going to the council meetings because every time she went, the "important " news was always bad news. She sighed…

Padme dressed slowly into a blue, conservative dress that was lying on the bed when she came back from the fresher. She once again felt that she was being treated as a child. She couldn't even pick her own clothes… But it didn't matter. There was no one there to impress since Anakin was gone.

"Oh stop it. Stop thinking about him," and quickly scolded herself for being so clingy to someone who probably didn't even love her anymore. But she felt that she was mostly just trying to convince herself of these injustices…

"He has to love me." _Then why is he trying to hunt you down and kill you?_

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"Senator Amidala, the Council wishes to discuss something with you."

_Obviously_, she thought. _That's why I'm here._

"Darth Vader has notified us that he knows you are here and that he will make a compromise with us. He has taken captive three of our men and four of the little ones. He has also made clear that if we hand you over to him, he will return the Jedi and the padawans safely back. But if we keep you here, he will kill them all, and will then attack this planet. We have asked you here because we have decided that it is your decision on the outcome of this situation."

Padme thought about it but she already knew well in her heart and mind the answer.

"I would like to inform the council on my decision…." she began. "I have decided that I will hand myself over to Darth Vader."

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_Author: Ooh i wonder what will happen next. grins mischieviously. You're all lucky that there aren't any cliffhangers in this story. I wrote this all at once so you don't have to wait for updates. Quite frankly, i hate reading stories and then having to wait for what comes next, and then alot of times the people dont even finish writing the stories. You're lucky I'm so considerate._


	4. Chapter 4

They had told Padme to get a night's rest and that the next day they would follow out with the negotiation. She actually felt at peace with herself. She knew that whatever happened, it would be a win-win situation on her part, because if he killed her, then that meant he no longer loved her and Padme knew she would've killed herself anyway. She knew she couldn't live without him. And if he didn't kill her and professed that he still loved her, then he would _have_ to come back to the Light side and everything would be right again. The second one sounded a bit cliché, but, who knew what would happen. Love makes people due funny things.

She started thinking about the good times she had with Ani. It helped her believe that he could change. She remembered one night in Naboo. It was raining. There wasn't a bit of sunshine in the sky, no happiness radiating from the animals, but somehow, it couldn't have been more romantic. It was beautiful. She was crying because her father Ryoo had just passed onto the Force, and she needed to be away from everything. She was sitting in the middle of an open field, thinking how the scenery just seemed to make things worse. She felt like killing herself. Then he came.

He was holding a single rose and handed it to her. Padme smiled. No words were passed but every meaning was as clear as if they _were_ spoken out loud. He held her so close that from a distance they would've just seemed as one. That's how they felt. Padme snuggled in the crook of his neck, closed her eyes, and let a sigh of relief. She let her troubles go because she knew Anakin would always be there for her. He would hold the troubles of the world for her if she asked. Because she knew he loved her. "Thank you…" she whispered. He just kissed the top of her head in response. It was wonderful.

"_But where the hell was he!_" now she thought angrily.

Padme picked up a glass vase filled with roses on her desk. She threw it with all her might at the opposing wall. She wasn't satisfied with the loud shattering noise it made.

"WHERE ARE YOU! ANAKIN I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME.! YOU FUCKING PROMISED ME YOU WOULD ALWAYS BE TEHRE FOR ME, THAT YOU WOULD FUCKING NEVER CAUSE ME ANY PAIN! BUT WHERE ARE YOU NOW!"

She grabbed the sharp end of the broken vase and slashed at herself. "I hate you…" she whispered through clenched teeth, her tears stinging her skin. "I hate you!"

But she wasn't talking about Anakin. She was talking about herself.

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_Author: VERY short chapter...ah. sorry._


	5. Chapter 5

She wasn't ready for the next day. Her stomach was turning. She wasn't sure if she could handle all this angst. It was just too intense for her. Her tiny petite body was trembling. It was all she could to keep herself from fainting. But she knew she had to suck it up. This was only the beginning.

The council had decided to hold the swap in an undisclosed area, so as not to get as many people hurt if this didn't turn out as was planned. Jedi were everywhere, prepared for the worst. This didn't scare Padme. It was the fact that she was meeting her husband for the first time in two years. Sure she had seen holograms of what the new Anakin looked like, and then there were of course, her dreams. But still, it was the man she loved. She nervously twirled her wedding ring around her finger and she waited to leave. She wasn't really sure what to expect.

But finally, it was time.

They had blindfolded Padme saying that it would be safer that way. Of course she resisted but they were too strong for her. She resulted in not being able to see. She didn't know what was happening except that she was being lifted. Padme concluded that they were carrying her to the place. After a short while she was set on her feet and then she heard it….

…the labored breathing.


	6. Chapter 6

"I see that everything has turned out as planned" said Darth Vader, in the notorious deep voice.

"So far, has it. But finished, we are not." Replied Master Yoda. "Our men and little ones, you have."

"So be it" said Vader "here are your worthless men. Now hand over Padme."

She shivered at the sound of her name. It didn't sound like Ani. When he said her name it was full of love. But now it sounded as worthless as Vader felt the men and the younglings. Padme felt herself being nudged forward. The force was guiding her and keeping her from tripping. She longed to take the blindfold off and see her husband for herself. Her wish was answered. A cold heavy hand pulled the blindfold off. She came face to face with her nightmares. In front of her was her husband, her Anakin, her Darth Vader.


	7. Chapter 7

"Ani..?" she whispered. She was crying now. She longed to take the mask off and kiss her husband. What happened next was unexpected. She felt a pain in her stomach and realized that it was Darth Vader using the force to hurt her. She heard the Jedi coming to her aid but he was prepared, he had also brought stormtroopers for backup. Shots from blasters were being deflected by the Jedi's light sabers. She was suddenly lifted off of her feet and was being carried to the ship. She had read stories about woman who were lifted off of they're feet by their lovers, into the sunset and so forth. This was the same but so wrong... she just gave up and let herself go. She was covered in darkness.

When she woke up she was in chains. It was dark and she could barely see around her and what was happening. Padme struggled against the binds and resulted in bloodying herself. She gave up exhausted when she heard the sounds of footsteps. It was a storm trooper. Padme watched him stop at her cell and unlock it.

"Get up, Darth Vader and Darth Sidious would like to see you."

"I'd like to see you get up when your in chains." She said with as much venom as she could manage.

The storm trooper slapped her hard across the face, leaving distinct red imprints on her left cheek, and mumbled some words against her under his breath. Padme stared daggers at him.

She was then dragged through a couple of doors when finally, she found herself in a large room. There was what looked like a large upright table in the middle with chains at the top and the bottom.

"Great" she thought, "They're going to torture me."

She couldn't care less. She didn't want to live. She got her answer, there was no more Anakin, and this Darth Vader certainly didn't love her. Padme jut hoped they'd get this over with without much pain, but another glance at the torture table shattered her hopes.

"Padme..." Darth Vader started.

She closed her eyes and said nothing. She guessed this wasn't what they wanted to hear because she was lifted into the air and thrown against the wall.

"YOU WILL ANSWER ME WHEN I TALKS TO YOU!"

Padme screamed, "I will only answer my husband. And you are not my husband!"

She was once again thrown into a wall. There was a cracking noise this time. Her arm was in pain.

"You husband is dead Padme! Your lies and deceit killed him! You did this to him!"

The tears were flowing. She didn't even try to hold them in.

"I'm sorry …" she whispered.

She knew this was her fault. She had blamed herself from the start; the scars were there to prove it. She was on her knees now.

"Ani…please. I'm sorry for all I've done. Please come back to me. This is not who you are…please. I love you."

"LIES!" screamed Vader. "THESE ARE ALL LIES. YOU NEVER LOVED ME. IF YOU DID YOU WOULDN'T HAVE GONE AGAINST ME. YOU JOINED OBI WON. YOU DON'T LOVE ME"

There was a sudden pain in her body that was incredible. Padme felt as if she was going to explode. There was blood everywhere. Her blood. Darth Vader was once again using the force to kill her.

"Anakin I could never hate you. I've always loved you and will always."

The pain was increasing.

"I'm sorry Ani! Don't do this! I know you love me too. Please stop. ANI!"

The pain was excruciating. She was on the verge of passing out, yet her mind kept wandering to the good times. She flashed back to when they were drying themselves on the grass. He kissed her. He smelled so good. She caressed his cheek and looked into his eyes. Then another flashback. She was hit during the clone war. He stood near her bedside until she recuperated.

…But that man was gone. Her tears were flowing like a river. She didn't have that much strength left.

"…Ani…I'm sorry…for every pain I've cause you…"

She could hear the buzz of the lightsaber near her neck now. This is it she thought…she could hear Darth Sidious screaming, "Yes! Yesss! Now finish her! Use your hate to muster your power!"

There was a battle going inside Anakin. He had always loved Padme. He still did. Very much. But there was so much hate building up inside him, a dark cloud was shrouding his good judgement, as if a black vale was covering his eyes. He could see himself doing all these things, but it was as if he had no control over his bodily functions and thoughts. He just felt hate. He hated her for being afraid of him. He hated her for going to Obi Wan instead of him. He hated her for still loving him. Why was she so good? _He_ was the one who caused all this pain. _He was_ the one who turned to the dark side. Yet it was _she_ who was apologizing, she was the one who was going to give up her life for him. Why was he being like this? Why was he killing, doing all this evil? But the dark side in him was winning…

She could try one more time though to reach through to him….

"Ani I …I love you. … so much. Please, tell me ..you …. You love me back…."

Her time was coming…she couldn't hold on much longer. She just needed to hear him say those three words. Those three words that she heard so often back then…that she took for granted.

Her tears had seized a long while ago, and there were no more for her to give. She hated herself for letting this happen to him. It was her fault. She should've came to him in the beginning. He needed her but she just hid. She was the worst wife anyone could have. She hated herself. She felt that he _should_ kill her. Anakin deserved better. Not trash like her. But before she died she would've liked to here those words…even if he was just lying.

Anakin had decided. He lowered his saber. Padme was relieved. She had brought him back.

But she was horribly mistaken. Darth Vader was just trying to get momentum in that little action. In a second, his light saber coursed through Padme. She was dead.

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_Author: Wow...the bastard._


	8. Chapter 8

Anakin couldn't believe what he had done.

"Goood. Very good. You will do very well, my apprentice," said Sidious. "You have done well. You may retire."

"Yes master." said Vader.

He was numb.

What had he done? Had he just killed his wife? The one whom he vowed to save?

He couldn't believe it. Wasn't she the one who kept him going every day, kept him from killing? He hadn't killed anybody since he found out that she was alive. He knew that she wouldn't ever approve. He ruined everything. He had planned to take her back and overthrow Sidious. He had planned to restore the balance of the force, to fill out his duty as the chosen one.

And WHAT DID HE DO? He still couldn't take it in. He loved her. So much. He knew he did. Even when he striked her with his saber. But for some reason, there was so much hate building up in him, he didn't know where it was from. He wasn't supposed to kill her. He was so supposed to save her and kill Darth Sidious, not Padme. His love. His wife. What did he do…this wasn't the plan. He went back to his cell.

As he thought more about what he just encountered, realization set in. He killed his wife. He loved her. She loved him. She loved him a lot. And never stopped. Always did love him. She was sorry. But she didn't do anything.

"Padme!" he screamed.. "IM SO SORRY…IM SO SORRY…please forgive me!"

He held his head in his hands…and he cried. The famous Darth Vader, crying. But he wasn't Darth Vader. He was Anakin Skywalker. There was coldness absorbing his body. This wasn't new. He remembered her last words.

"Ani, I love you, please tell me you love me back."

Anakin felt this was the least he could do.

He whispered," padme I love you. With all my heart, with all my soul. You don't understand how much I love you. I would die for you. I'd do anything for you. Except look what I've done. I killed you and myself. Padme I miss you so much…I hate myself. I need you back….please. Come back to me….I need you."

A warmth touched his heart. It startled him. He had not felt it in so long. He hadn't felt it since he had padme. He looked up.

"Ani, I love you too. So much." It was _Padme_.

For some reason this whole occurance felt natural. Like it was fate and this was supposed to happen all along.

"Padme, please, forgive me. I'm so sorry for all that I've done."

Padme knelt down. She was bowing to him. Showing that she felt she wasn't even good enough for him to look him in the face. He couldn't believe her. She was so good.

"No Ani, this was my fault. I wasn't there for you. Forgive _me._ Please…" A

nakin couldn't take it anymore. He took off his helmet exposing his face. Even if it would kill him, he needed to kiss her. Even though he was scarred and deformed, to Padme, he never looked more handsome.

"Padme, I love you."

He kissed her with as much passion he could muster, forgetting all of his wrongdoings, because he knew Padme didn't care. She cared that he was back to the Anakin she knew, the one that loved her. The one she had married…

"Padme what am I going to do? I can't live anymore, I just want to leave this cruel world and be with you forever and always, with no more disturbances, no more evil and hate to get in our way. Just me and you, like we always wanted."

"No, my love. You must follow your destiny. You need to kill Darth Sidious." She kissed him one more time. "I'll always be with you, and I will always love you." With that she disappeared.

Anakin knew what he must do.


	9. Chapter 9

He put his mask on and was surprised that he was able to breathe without the difficulty he usually faced when he wasn't with the mask. Even with the mask he had trouble breathing. He decided that it was because Padme was with him. Padme always had that effect on him. God, he loved that woman. Anakin, no longer Darth Vader, put on the helmet. He wanted to get this over with. No longer will Darth Sidious manipulate people to the Dark Side and ruin the lives of innocent people. More determined then ever, he left to defeat his "master".

"Ah, young apprentice. What troubles have brought you here?"

"Sidious I have come to defeat you once and for all. You will no longer live to see the light of day."

He switched his saber on and the familiar buzz resonated. Anakin painfully remembered that this was the weapon that had killed his wife. _At least now_, he thought, _it will be put to the right use._

"Vader, you fool, you cannot defeat me! It is a pity that you will have to die, you were very powerful and could've been even more powerful then I. But alas, you have chosen your path. Now you must pay the consequences."

His words powered Anakin's anger. He charged at Sidious with his light saber and at once they were engaged in battle. Anakin moved swiftly and accurately, thanks to all his training by Master Obi won. He was a good match for Sidious.

The battle raged on and one couldn't tell who would win. They were so close in expertise. Once again, Ani could feel the warmth somewhere deep in him. He knew Padme was with him. This gave him more strength. He knew he had to win; he had to win for Padme.

"Sidious you will not conquer me!" and he grabbed into the force, pushing Sidious hard into the ground.

"Vader… you have done …well. But you don't want to kill me, now do you? I have been so good to---"but before he could finish. Anakin thrust his saber into his heart and killed him.

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_Author: Yayyy!_


	10. Epilogue

**Epilogue:**

_He stood by her grave holding a single rose. Anakin knew she liked roses…_

_It had been eighty three years since he had killed Padme and Sidious. He was an old man already. The balance was restored to the Force and all was well. He was able to get out of the black suit and helmet and regain his original appearance, due to the advancing technology, thus enabling him to live a somewhat normal life, physically. Anakin had met his twin son and daughter and had lived with them for a while until they had gotten married. Leia with a young man named Han Solo and Luke with a nice girl named Yutoo Owenii. Anakin bought a home near Padme's grave so he could visit her everyday. He was getting tired of not being able to be with her physically, but sometimes, when he was lucky, she would contact him. But only for a little while. And sometimes Obi Won too, who had died some years ago. Anakin felt he was ready to be with his wife…_

_He got up quite easily, using the force as a crutch. He chuckled to himself. He was acting more and more like Master Yoda…_

_Anakin went to his bedroom and walked to his bed. He lied down. He had enough. Anakin knew his time had come. The force was drawing him in. With eyes half closed, he swore he saw a white outline in the corner of his eye. _

_"Padme" he whispered, "finally…we can be together."_

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Author: And...it...is...finished. Of course i had to end it in a happy way! I don't like the thought of Anakin old like that but i had to end it. So what'd you think? It sucked, it was awesome? TEll me! I'm hoping that you enjoyed the story. It makes me happy to know that people like the way i viewed Padme and Anakin's love..

Well thank you for reading, leave reviews! _Pautsz_


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